Houston, Texas, and the country mouse

It's not often that I feel like a hick from the country. I've lived in New York, have visited DC frequently, and usually feel as if I'm dressed appropriately and am using the correct fork. However, I went to Houston this week. And felt like the poor relation from the outback. The women dress. Really dress. And they shop. And they wear LOTS of jewelry. And they shop some more.

Of course, the good part about Houston is that everyone is friendly and polite. That goes a long way. But I still can't forgive them, and the state at large, for giving us the Current Occupant, no mater how chastened he appears at present. They really should have stuck to shopping. The world would be a better place.

Garrison kicks butt

You go, Garrison. Today in your weekly newspaper column, The Old Scout , you refer to the Current Occupant and his gang as merging "blithering corruption with murderous incompetence." I couldn't have said it better myself. Garrison's words were part of a persuasive essay on the joys of retirement, especially as they apply to Bush, Rove, and Cheney.

My papa, who is old and frail, is still very much aware what has happened to the country he served in WWII. His goal in his own retirement was to live long enough to see the Red Sox win the World Series. That has happened. So now he's on a roll: his plan is to live long enough to see the Bushies go back to the place from whence they came. If Bush took Garrison's advice and retired, my father could set himself yet another task--to see the Red Sox win twice in his lifetime. I'm not betting on either Bush or the Red Sox to do the right thing, but I am betting on my father and his cohort to do all they can to throw the bums out on Tuesday.

Vote early and often

If you need some relief from the relentlessness of the current drive to unseat the Bushies and all their works, take a peak at Edwin O'Conner's 1956 book, The Last Hurrah. Loosely based on the life of James Michael Curley, perennial mayor of Boston, governor, representative, and jailbird, the book will make you laugh until you cry, and cry until you laugh.

And "vote early and often" is actually from a campaign song for Curley. That's what we need right now--a campaign song. I just can't decide which of our great pols it should feature. There are so many who would be perfect subjects.

Romania and USCIS

In the wake of 911, our government no longer represents the people. It represents itself, and that is quite different. Here's a case in point:

My church, a large Unitarian Universalist congregation in St. Paul, has a partner relationship with a Unitarian village in Romania. Our tradition is to bring people here every other year. We have brought the minister of the Transylvanian village church, and an elderly couple who had never been on an airplane until they visited us in 2002. We had hoped to bring two younger couples to visit us this year. Guess what: they were turned down by USCIS (United States Citizenship and Immigration Service) after travelling over the mountains to the US Consultate in Bucharest. Because they did not have "compelling" (USCIS language, not mine) reasons to return to Romania, the two couples were denied visas.

What is "compelling"? You might well ask. These folks are substantial village citizens, church-goers, land owners, and parents. This was not enough for the United States, which apparently fears that these Romanians will become a drain on the body politic. On appeal, the USCIS reversed itself, offering a compromise. The two women can come to the US, leaving their menfolk behind, adding to the existing hostages--children, the farm animals, the house, the barn, the parents, and the jobs.

Is this retalliation for the Romanian president having the temerity to ask the US to drop visia requirements? Whatever the reason, this is pretty sad. But they are coming, which is great. I hope we can show them that not all US citizens are afraid and that our present government's fearmongering is not representative.

John Kerry does it again

Come on, John. Why give in to the fearful Democrats, and the incessant marketing of the Bushies? Tell it like it is, which is that what you said about being stuck in Iraq is nothing compared to the "weapons of mass destruction", "yellowcake" and the rest of the bald lies that have come out of this administration.

You don't need to pander to these guys. You don't tell jokes very well, but are you so weak in the knees that you can't stand up to idiots? You know, and I know, that picking on you is an act of desperation. Why not just toss it back at them and hope it explodes?

Dick and Harry

I went to a Halloween party this weekend. The prize costume was a two man show, one dressed up as Dick Cheney in full hunting gear, the other as the hapless Harry Whittington, complete with buckshot all over his face.

And Dick Cheney is the guy who is telling anyone who will listen that if we allow the Congress to slide in the direction of the Dems, the terrorists will win. Doesn't this sound a little desperate? I thought, silly me, that the possibility of changing your government peacefully was one of those blessings of democracy that we were trying to impose on the Iraqi people. I must have misunderstood ....maybe I have buckshot in my ears and don't know it.

Michele Bachmann

It feels like such a cliche to pick on Michele Bachmann. Nevertheless, the voters in the Minnesota 6th District need to think about whether they really want a representative in Washington who relies on her husband (and through him, God), to tell her what to do, what to think, and how to be. She, my friends, is not an independent thinker, capable of evaluating the current Washington nuttiness through any lens at all, let alone her own understanding of the needs of the MN 6th.

Both Michele and her husband, Marcus, have degrees from institutions such as Regent University or Oral Roberts U. These institutions, among other things, are known for their allegiance to a fairly particular and pecular variety of Christianity (I'm being polite here). I have to wonder, for example, what the Oral Roberts natural history museum features. Surely there are no displays illustrating geologic time, as, according to folks like Michele and her classmates, there is no such thing. Another telling feature of Oral Roberts is that, according to their web site, 572 applicants of the 594 who applied were accepted. This is not a selective institution.

But this is really not important, just illustrative of Michele's background. What is important is that Michele is apparently incapable of thinking for herself. Her husband told her to go to law school, study tax law (which apparently she hated), take in foster children, run for the MN House, and then run for the US Senate, changing quickly to the House of Representatives when it became apparent that Mark Kennedy was the annointed one for Dayton's soon-to-be-vacant Senate seat. She may not be able to think for herself, but boy, is she flexible.

And Michele still has a chance, at least if you read the tea leaves, or the national republicans coming to her aid. Laura Bush, Cheney, Norm Coleman, etc. But, sadly for Michele, not the Current Occupant himself. Apparently Michele has the hots for cheerleader in chief. The Current Occupant, says Michele, is "buff".

Hey, 6th District. Let's not make Minnesota a laughing stock. Vote for Patty Wetterling.

Woof, Woof, or Norm Coleman chases the stick

I used to think that Tony Blair was the ultimate lap dog, doing whatever his master in DC wanted in order to receive treats and lovin'. But Norm Coleman is an even better model. He is the darling of the RNC, because he comes from a blue state (sort of), and even used to be a Democrat (sort of), and pro-choice (sort of). But ol' Norm has religion (sort of). Today in the Strib, he was shown to have floated a "don't let all the states become California" measure to stop individual states from taking a stand on carbon emissions and, by extension, global warming. Nuts, but, given his current willingness to follow along two steps behind his master, fetching sticks and chasing random squirrels, not surprising.

But I do think Norm's tail has not felt the Minnesota change in the wind. The RNC has pulled out of Minnesota, except for the Michelle Bachman-Patty Wetterling race. Michelle is the kind of right-winger we secular humanists (haven't heard that for a while, have you) love to hate. Anti-choice, anti-public schools, anti-gay, anti-immigrant, Michelle stands only for turning back the clock to about 1880. And she still has a chance, in a district that is consistently Republican and a tough slog for any Democrat. So the RNC is in there fighting. But they don't seem to be bringing Norm in to stump for her. As the Strib observed today, Michelle is genuinely nuts, whereas Norm is only nuts because that's what his master wants. It's a head shaker--what happened to this nice Jewish boy from Queens?

Minnesota weather and liberal politics

It's snowing in Minnesota, or at least parts of it. This is not typical, although we denizens of the North Star State certainly pride ourselves on our harsh weather and our ability to tolerate it. We often exaggerate how cold it gets. It makes us feel important, unusual, unique. Certain pundits think that the weather, and our traditionally liberal politics (more or less), are linked. So here's the question: is the fact that MN is now seen in some quarters as a purple state, rather than a blue state, a consequence of global warming? The warmer we get, the less liberal? You wouldn't believe there is such a thing as global warming today--it's 35 degrees, with a 40 MPH "breeze". This may bode well for the DFL candidates for Congress, as long as it stays cold. If there's Indian summer, watch out....

Congressman Foley and sexual harassment

Poor Congressman Foley. But nobody gets what is going on. I find myself infuriated that this matter now seems to be about everything except the kitchen sink. The pundits talk about pedophillia, predatory behavior, and who knew what when. This last is the most on target, but everyone still misses the point.

What Congressman Foley did was sexual harassment. I'm no lawyer, but I believe that sexual harassment is when someone in a position of power requests sexual favors in an explicit or implicit quid pro quo. Teachers (you'll get an A), clergy (I won't tell your parents), employers (you say you want a corner office?), or congress persons (would you like to meet the President?). Co-workers and managers (i.e., Dennis Hastert) can be liable for sexual harassment even if they didn't do anything themselves, but allowed someone else to continue to harass employees, students, or pages. Both harassment, and allowing harassment, are in violation of federal employment law.

I'm so sick of people focusing on Congressman Foley's homosexuality, or the morality of his behavior, or the general tone of Congress. That has nothing to do with this. It's harassment, and Hastert should get out while the getting is good. It happened on his watch, he knew about it, and he did nothing. Whew!

Alan Fine and the Star Tribune

How dumb does the current gang of thieves think we are? Here's a knee slapper, or exhibit A. Alan Fine is the Republican candidate for Minnesota's fifth district, and a guy without a prayer. He thus can sling mud wherever it might stick, helping other Republican candidates for public office. He is now full of righteous anger because the Star Tribune revealed that he had an expunged domestic violence record. And Alan, of course, has been leading the charge against the DFL candidate Keith Ellison for his unpaid parking tickets. Character, says Alan, matters.

Now I may be dumb, but I ain't stupid. I do believe that parking tickets are qualitatively different from domestic violence charges. The hypocrisy of the GOP is seemingly unbounded. It's apprently OK for them to get away with stuff that is a tear in the fabric of our national moral psyche if done by Democrats. When you set yourself up as the party of righteousness, you have to expect that folks will take pot shots. It goes with the territory. So, Alan, if you can't take the heat, get out of the kitchen. And, Star Tribune, keep on keeping on. More cliches later.

PS Take a look at Alan's web site. He's for (gasp) world peace! He appears to be starting off with a bang.

Foleygate and the Star Tribune

The Minneapolis Star Tribune, lovingly known to locals as the Strib, carries a horrible column by Jonah Goldberg, son of Lucienne Goldberg, the eminence grise behind the Monica affair during those halcion days of yore. Anyway, the Strib should be ashamed to run his stuff, but they, like every other quasi-liberal media outlet, pander like crazy.

Case in point. Today, ol' Jonah went on a rampage about the hypocrisy of Democrats, who, he believes, allowed Bill, Gary Stubbs, and other ghosts of a bygone era to get off scott free (censure? impeachment? scott free?), while taking poor Mr. Foley to the cleaners. I think Jonah missed the point. I don't remember that the Democrats campaigned on their so-called family values, their hatred for gays, or their religiosity. The Republicans did that. So, when they are hoist on their own petard, the GOP and their holier-than-thou supporters resoundingly deserve the label of hypocrite. There are certainly hypocrites in this story, but they ain't Dems. Take that mote out of your eye, Jonah. And Strib, stop wasting ink.

Minneapolis school conferences

It's school conference time in Minneapolis. It probably is where you live, too. Joe College Grad, who is teaching first grade in the Bronx, reported that he had sandwiched in parent-teacher conferences in between the high holy days and Columbus day. Apparently few parents attended.

That's not the case at Minneapolis South High, where I'm doing PT conferences for the third time. Most of the teachers are now familiar faces, and there are lots of middle aged parents milling around, learning that little Sean or Nick or Emily is doing very well.

And that's the problem with PT conferences, of course. The families who should come don't. Kids who have marginal school performance often have families who are diengaged from their school life. And it's easy to become disengaged. Now that I have kid #3 at South High, Joe High School, I feel as if I know the ropes. I don't pay as much attention to details as I did 8 years ago, when Joe College Grad hit South with a bang.

But education is the pre-eminent value in our family, so my disengagement probably registers as over-involvement on some meters. But what really struck me this time was that all the teachers are old, over 50. And that, of course, is the result of the funding scene in Minneapolis for schools. There is no money for teachers, and only the most senior have been able to hold on to their jobs.

And while there is some benefit to having a teacher who really knows what he or she is doing, there is also some benefit to having fresh perspective, energy, and gratitude for the job. And there is really major benefit to having enough teachers that you don't have to have 38 kids in a French II class. That is really disgraceful, and any Republican who tells you otherwise should have to teach that class for a week, although I suspect that they won't know French....

Logan Airport

I've been flying in and out of Logan for around 45 years. From my first solo trip to England, at age 16, to an unknown number of trips from MSP to Boston, Logan airport is either the destination or the departure venue. And, throughout all those years, it has always been under construction. Always.

Today, Terminal C (or was it B)--anyway, the US Airways terminal--seemed totally inaccessible because of massive sidewalk construction activities. Fortunately, NWA flies out of terminal E, which is the international terminal. During the day, NWA is one of the few airlines operating, making terminal E actually pleasant (the international airways perk up in the late afternoon). And it's no longer under construction, although it was for at least five years.

Apparently huge airports never cease their self-improvement activities. This constant effort to rearrange the landscape resulted in the Big Dig, an effort to streamline Boston's terrible roadway system that certainly helped fuel stereotypes about Boston drivers. Unfortunately, the Big Dig collapsed, killing a motorist, and causing the thing to shut down. The result, of course, was more construction on the tunnels that lead to the airport. As of today, the tunnel is still closed west-bound, forcing tourists onto the streets of South Boston. I do believe that the Boston economy requires major construction projects to stay alive. So even if Logan airport were cement-truck-free, there would still be massive disruption just getting to the place. There has to be serious government-funded construction activity at all times in Beantown. Right now, visitors to Boston who pick up rental cars at Logan are treated to a view of South Boston's industrial wasteland as they circle around the disabled tunnel. And I love it. Logan is my home. Just like Tom Hanks in Terminal.

Civilization and its discontents, Minneapolis-style

Yesterday afternoon was unpleasant. First, I went to Radio Shack. It's a tiny storefront in a down-at-the-heels strip mall. It was crowded, and there were three clerks, all girls around 16 or 17. I was working on my transaction, returning something, when a guy somewhat younger than I rushed in, went to the back of the store, and quickly came to the counter where I was standing.

"Excuse me, but you look like you're about finished here. Do you have a box of 50 CDs rather than 25 CDs?" We were not finished, as I had just started telling the clerk why I was returning the phone headset (my el-cheapo cell phone didn't recognize it.)

My body language or glance must have conveyed my irritation, as the man said, "Are you enjoying this beautiful day?" I turned to him in some puzzlement, as it was pouring, and I wondered who he was talking to. I grunted, and he persisted. "You know, I sacrificed so that you could enjoy this beautiful day. You should thank God for me every day."

He stared at me very aggressively, and I said, "Oh?"

"Yes," he went on, "I gave up my youth so that you could enjoy this gorgeous day."

I responded, "Oh, and when was that?"

"In Vietnam, " he said. "And you are alive and standing here on this beautiful day because of me."

I said, "Well, it's great that we're both alive." That clearly was not the response he wanted, but he kept staring at me. The teenage clerk was staring at him.

And here's the deal: I was not going to engage him on the mechanics of Vietnam, and how his presence or absence there had little to do with me. And, I didn't believe he had actually been there, unless he enlisted at a very young age. He was too young. But, the young clerk really couldn't deal with him and me, so I drifted away, resolving never to come back to that Radio Shack, even though it's the closest to my house. He was nuts. And he wore a pimp hat. But he had clearly fixed on that ploy to get people my age to do his bidding. It worked.

I got in the car and headed to the food co-op, stewing. Right behind me were some teenagers in a low-rider truck with the woofers at top volume. The pavement shook, and I heard the scatalogical lyrics of the song very clearly, even though my windows were closed. "I hope they go deaf," was my uncharitable thought.

Then I arrived at the food co-op. It was crowded, they were stocking the shelves, and I scowled at everyone, irritated by the self-righteous appearance of all the 40-somethings who were filling their carts with organic this and fair-trade that. My cart was similar, but, of course, I was not self-righteous. I fumed at the folks who somehow didn't sense I was right behind them and move over. I made my purchases and left.

Then I went to the liquor store. The tiny parking lot, which holds about eight cars, had three SUVs taking 1.5 spaces each. I had to wait to park. "People should not be allowed to purchase these things in the city. They accomplish nothing, and they are used for commuting, trips to the store, and anything you could use a Toyota Pirus for," I ranted to myself. I don't own a Toyota Prius, but my cars usually get more than 5 mpg. I finally parked, got my bottle of wine, and left. Someone was waiting for my space. The SUVs were still there--I suspect the drivers were not shopping at the liquor store.

Finally driving home, I fumed and sulked. Several of the streets were under construction, with huge ruts, and "Road Closed" signs. People did not know how to navigate these single lane streets. I fumed some more, believing that I had now figured out why people move to the suburbs. But I hadn't--not yet. At first I thought I had succumbed to right wing mania, and my dearly held liberal views and live-and-let live attitudes had finally cracked under the strain. But the enthnicity of all the offending folks varied, and included several of my own persuasion. Finally, after brooding about it for a while, a light flashed.

All of these incidents were caused partly by someone else's thoughtlessness and being human, in other words, self-centered. But, in the suburbs, there would be so much room that being thoughtless would not have been remarkable. There would have been a clerk to deal with the Vietnam guy at Radio Shack. The teenagers with the super sound system would have been able to pass me. The coop's aisles would not have been crowded. The liquor store would have had a bigger parking lot. In other words, they could have all been incredibly rude, and it would not have bothered me, because I wouldn't have experienced it. I would have just have continued to do my own thing, secure in my own little bubble, without outside intrusion. We not only need to learn to live together, but to do it in very tight circumstances. Density matters.